Dangerous Adoption

We are thankful to Paul Pennington and Hope for Orphans for their wisdom and discernment!

Dangerous Adoption

Remember that God wants to use you as an instrument of grace in the lives of your body of believers. He also wants to use that body to help you when the wheels of your life come off. Does your church have a support group for families adopting special needs children? Does your church have an orphans ministry at all? Pastor Chuck Swindoll says: “The test of our morality and theology is passed or failed by our response to the weakest and most helpless among us”. May God use you and your church as a demonstration of pure religion that is pleasing to Him.

[NOTE:  This post was originally written by Paul and Robin Pennington for the Hope for Orphans April 2010 E-Newsletter, which can be found here.]

By now you no doubt have heard about the Russian 8-year-old adoptee sent by his American adoptive mom….alone…back to Russia with a note. The repercussions of this decision on hundreds of Russian children waiting for families are devastating to be sure. What many don’t know is that failed adoptions, or disruptions as they are called, are on the rise and Christians are not immune even if it does not reach such a dramatic level. In fact, Christian families are in some ways more at risk.

Little noticed in the story of the Russian child is that his master-degreed, medical professional mom chose to pursue a “special needs” child because she wanted to get a child more quickly. It also appears that despite the routine communications of her agency post placement, she did not have an effective post adoptive support system.

This story teaches us about two very important trends in the North American adoption and orphan ministry movement.  One trend (though a very small percentage of the total number of adoptions) is negative and dangerous, the other positive and encouraging.

In an ever-increasing consumerist American church there is emerging a troubling trend — families who see adoption as a new badge of spirituality. At Hope for Orphans, we stress that those considering adoption should carefully examine their motivations before they ever begin the adoption process.

Common red flags we see are: pursuing adoption as a mission, wanting to please God as a result of sins of the past, desiring a sister or brother for a biological child, or thinking it will help a struggling marriage. Orphaned children do not want or need to be a mission, an act of atonement, a companion strategy or a marriage enhancer….no, they want and need what every child wants and needs…..a mom and dad that loves them unconditionally. Motives that are not geared towards the “unconditional” love of a child, but rather focused more on meeting a need in the parent(s) are dangerous.

It is a sign of a more “me-centered” Christianity that leads to adopting special needs children as a means of getting into the “express lane”. This sort of thinking, which minimizes or dismisses the true needs of hurt children and doesn’t take the time to count the costs, has led to an 8-year-old who sits today confused in a Russian hospital.

On the other hand, more and more there is a wonderful trend and work of God that is the counter to this very sad case. Lay leaders led by the Holy Spirit are launching orphan ministries in their local churches. Many of these new ministries are creating adoption support groups. Typically, adoptive families blessed with years of experience, come alongside new adoptive families, as mentors, coaches, crisis responders, prayer warriors and respite caregivers. This is what the Bible calls “body life”. The Scripture tells us in 1 Corinthians 12: “so that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it. Now you are Christ’s body, and individually members of it.”

God moves in the waiting...

Last March Randy and Candice Wagenleitner received word that their long wait for a baby girl in Korea was almost over.  A few short months later Elliana Sa-rang was home, with parents and three older brothers to love her! 

Though their 5 year wait was hard and long, they learned a lot along the way and God used this time to share His heart for the fatherless with them.  In a letter to Lifesong they wrote:

…God has used this adoption to forever change our hearts and give us a huge passion to care for the 147 million orphans left in the world.  Like it seems to be for a lot of families, when we first started talking about adoption years ago it was mostly to add another child to our family- specifically a daughter that we had never had.  But somewhere along the way God opened our eyes and hearts to all of the children who are left without a mommy and daddy and without someone to share the love of Christ with them.  We began to see the bigger picture of God’s adoption of us into His family and how adoption is the gospel lived out.

Now we cannot seem to sit still because we want to advocate and be a voice for those who cannot speak up for themsleves!  It has started small, but we are faithfully praying that the Lord would use us in whatever ways He sees fit…

…We are SO excited that we will be attending the Orphan Summit in April- largely in part  because of Lifesong’ encouragement to attend!  We may not have even know about it if it weren’t for Andy’s email...  We checked it out… and just knew that it would be the perfect starting poiunt for the Lord to give us a clear direction of what to do next…

Check out Candice's blog here!

How can my church become more 'adoption-friendly'?

World Magazine article, Look After Orphans (Paul Golden, January 30, 2010), presents 20 proactive ways in which your church can answer the call to 'look after orphans in their distress' (James 1:27)

Here are some highlights:

#1--'Pray that you and your church would become adoption-friendly'

#4--'Make adoption resources available to the church'

#10--'Create a standing chruch fund for adoption costs'

#16--'Sponsor a child'

Want to know more?

Read the article online or join us on our Facebook fan page as we feature these 20 ways in the next 20 days!

Lifesong Honduras Update

From Guy, director of Lifesong Honduras -

“Every year, after consideration and prayer, I come up with a theme or saying that will help further establish the ministry’s vision in the leaders, staff and student body over the year. We are launching this year focused on the realization that in order for the Gospel of Christ to change this nation, the 76 leaders and staff need to have a personal “revolution” in their lives, creating the snowball effect of the ministry encountering its “revolution”, which in turn will effect the lives of the students and create a “spiritual revolution” through the country of Honduras. In every historical turn of events in any given country, whether good or bad, these events began with a revolution.  I believe that this same attitude can and will overtake us this year and create a “revolution”. With this said, this year’s focus statement is, “I Am the Revolution of Christ to My Nation!”

As you receive this report some 260 new students are arriving on campus  for the two-week Introductory Course and if all of them pass this introductory course we will have a record high of 530 students total for the year, which is around 50 more than we have had in years past. Obviously, we will be faced with overcrowding challenges and potential budget issues, but rather than being discouraged by this we chose to see it as “blessing” and are encouraged in what God is doing.      

Even with the past years political upheaval, I am proud to say that here at Plan Escalon, we did not miss one day of classes.  Our students continued to receive their education and are now way ahead of those from other institutions.

The addition of the third floor continues to make progress. We are in the middle of adding the ceiling beams and roofing tin. The school year will need to begin with the new 7a.m. to 3 p.m. schedule, as planned, albeit without doors, windows, lighting or paint on the walls, but all of these are things that can be finished as the year progresses and financing allows for it.

As the last topic of interest, I was recently informed that six orphans were discovered living in the mountain village of Agua Buena. With the help of some of our church families in the area, who were willing to take them into their own homes, we have been blessed to help these individual families by providing them with the financial help required for each orphans daily needs and expenses.

This year will be a year full of many new dynamics, but more importantly, it promises to be a year full of many positive changes!”